What to Expect from These 6 Life Stages

In Isaiah 46, the Lord says, “Listen to me, house of Jacob, all the remnant of the house of Israel, who have been sustained from the womb, carried along since birth. I will be the same until your old age, and I will bear you up when you turn gray.” Isaiah 46:3-4 (CSB)

As he carries us from birth to old age, each person’s journey is unique. However, God has also created the human life span in such a way that there are some common milestones and situations that almost everyone experiences. Life development is an intricate and captivating process that unfolds via many physical, cognitive, emotional and social changes.

At GuideStone®, we believe it’s important to focus on the holistic wellness of a person as part of their life development, including the above changes and more. To get insight on what events typically mark life stages and what to look out for, we consulted with Dewey Wilson, Ph.D., President/CEO of Strong Marriages in Dallas, Texas.

Here’s what we learned from these six life stages:

1. Birth – 5 Years

From the first moments of our lives, healthy attachment and bonding are essential, especially from birth to age 1. Language develops rapidly – a baby typically babbles in the first months of life and moves toward using single words. Eventually, in years 2 and 3, the baby becomes a toddler who can put together short sentences.

Additionally, playing with others is important for developing social skills and teaching the child how to cooperate and share with others. Peers are seen as individuals, and friendships are formed based on trust and shared interests.

As the years go on, the child also begins to think instinctively and naturally, attention span increases and memory skills rapidly improve.

2. School Stage, Ages 6-17

This phase, like birth, is a time of rapid and marked growth. Motor skills — balance and coordination — continue to improve from young childhood. This is a time when he or she can finally learn to ride a bike or play team sports on a foundational level.

The child can engage in analysis and logic when working through challenges. Effective problem-solving taught and modeled by adults around him or her is of vital importance since risk-taking increases — generally without considering consequences.

Relative thinking often replaces absolutes, so children in this stage start allowing the need for social acceptance and respect to dictate what society and those around them claim is morally correct. Ironically, while the need for acceptance grows, establishing individuality becomes a top priority.

3. College (18-25 years)

During this stage, physical development becomes generally complete and finishes by the mid-20s. Progressing through this phase, the young adult tends to become less active and thus more prone to weight gain and obesity.

Stress associated with life changes and challenges becomes difficult to navigate — such as moving through college, entering the workforce and figuring out relationship issues. The young adult’s identity often becomes defined largely by work and the need to be successful.

Intimate relationships are important and typically influenced by attachment styles developed during infancy. Self-focused entitlement and expectations developed through the previous phase of adolescence often contribute to high levels of stress in young marriages.

4. Adult (26-70 years)

Growing older, stress levels tend to increase as the body undergoes a multitude of physical and hormonal changes. Challenges with aging (wrinkling of skin, weakening senses, lack of physical strength, occasional memory loss, etc.) increase. However, stressors can often be minimized if the affected adult has a keen understanding of the issues and the appropriate action to take.

Socially, the adult — single or married — may still allow popularity and social acceptance to influence the sense and definition of self. Many married adults may look to peer couples or society to define the marital relationship instead of developing a “we” perspective of what is healthy for growing as a couple. If the couple has children, the relationship between spouses is often determined by the children’s schedules, with little time solely for each other. As the couple ages, coping with the challenges associated with adult children and their families is physically and mentally difficult for senior adults.

5. Home-going (any age)

Life is fragile, and, unfortunately, death can occur at any age. While each situation is unique, there are some overarching conclusions. For example:

• When a parent or caregiver loses a child, regardless of the child’s age, it tends to be the parent’s most profound sense of loss. In these circumstances, the poignant adage often recalled is that parents are not supposed to live longer than their children. Understandably in their grief, many parents express thoughts of failing as a protector.
• Suicide is the second leading cause of death among people ages 10-14 and 20-34 in the U.S.*
• For most middle-aged adults, life-threatening disease is the number one threat of death — thus, the need for self-awareness, diligence and regular physical checkups with a medical doctor.
• Moving into late adulthood, death tends to be more widely accepted or expected. Even still, many among the elderly fear dying alone. Moreover, if dealing with a terminal illness, the older adult may question whether his or her life still has value. Frequent communication and connection with loved ones (family and friends) can provide comfort and assurance while encouraging the use of talents and gifts can help re-instill a sense of purpose.

6. Legacy (Long lasting impact of a person’s life)

On a final note, the idea of legacy — the impact of a person’s life — is often attributed to being a concern only for those over the age of 30. In actuality, the conversation of legacy can start in adolescence.

• For the growing adult, ages 17-25, the goal is to establish the correct identity, identify one’s purpose, connect to an aligning mission and learn how to make the maximum impact possible.
• During ages 26-70, as the adult takes on more responsibilities — marriage, parenthood, career — the goal continues along with adding:
• Invest in your future early.
• Develop children and grandchildren by leading by example.
• Invest in your children’s future early.
• Handle your estate before death.

Life development is a complex journey marked by continuous growth and remarkable change. From infancy to old age, individuals experience massive transformations influenced by genetics, environment and personal choices. Navigating these stages of our lives is a gift from God; in all stages, we can rely on him to guide us.

As Isaiah 46 reminds us, the Lord is the same Lord from our birth to our old age, and he says, “I have made you, and I will carry you; I will bear and rescue you.” Isaiah 46:4 (CSB)

For more resources on life development, holistic wellness and resilience, visit GuideStone.org/WellnessRoadmap.

If you have questions or need additional assistance, you may reach a customer solutions specialist by calling 1-844-INS-GUIDE (1-844-467-4843), Monday through Friday, from 7 a.m. to 6 p.m. CT.

Dewey Wilson, Ph.D., is the President/CEO of Strong Marriages, Dallas, Texas. Dr. Wilson holds a Ph.D. in Psychology with an Emphasis in Cognition and Instruction.